A few years ago, I reached a point where I felt stuck. It wasn’t a big crisis, just a quiet sense that something was missing. I would wake up, go through my routine, and check off tasks, but inside I felt empty, as if I had lost something important and couldn’t remember what it was.
One quiet Sunday morning, while I was still in my pajamas and holding a cup of tea, I realized I no longer knew what I was passionate about.
If you’ve ever felt that uncertain, sinking feeling, you’re not alone. Finding your passion usually doesn’t happen overnight. It’s often a slow process of gathering small clues with curiosity and honesty.
These are the steps that helped me reconnect with myself and find what truly excites me.
1. Start With What Already Makes You Feel Alive
This was where I started, and it’s likely the easiest place for you to begin as well. I remember sitting at my kitchen table one afternoon, asking myself a simple question: when do I forget to check the time?
Work meetings? No. Scrolling through Instagram? Also no. I noticed I lost track of time when I was writing, thinking deeply, or having honest conversations with someone facing a challenge. That was my first clue.
Think about your own moments like that, when you are fully present and time flies by. Maybe it’s painting, solving problems, gardening, baking, or dancing in your kitchen. These activities don’t need to be impressive or productive; they just need to feel right for you.
You often find passion in things you call “just a hobby” or things you think don’t matter much.
2. Make a Joy List (Yes, With Pen and Paper)
One morning, feeling unusually clear-headed, I picked up my journal and wrote down everything that brought me joy. I didn’t worry about making sense—just followed my instincts about what felt good.
My list was a mix of odd and wonderful things: morning sunlight on the floor, the smell of old bookshops, sea air, laughing hard, and playlists that make me dance in the kitchen. Your list might be just as random, and that’s okay. Don’t worry if it’s practical or if anyone else would understand it. Look for patterns and themes that repeat, because those are often the gentle clues guiding you back to yourself.
This simple exercise can reveal what truly matters to you, not just what you think should matter.
3. Know Your Strengths (Even If They Feel Ordinary)
I used to overlook my natural strengths, thinking they were just part of who I am and not anything special. But looking back, I see that people often came to me to talk through big decisions, messy feelings, or creative ideas. It wasn’t random; it was a pattern throughout my life.
Your strengths may not stand out, but they quietly guide you toward what fits you best. Think about what people thank you for or what you do easily that others find difficult. That’s valuable, even if it doesn’t seem special to you. CliftonStrengths helped me put words to things I never thought to name. Try it if you’re struggling to identify your natural abilities—it’s like seeing yourself more clearly.
4. Explore With Curiosity, Not Expectation
I used to think I needed to know my purpose before trying anything new. But I learned the opposite is true, and that changed everything for me.
Things changed when I started saying yes to small curiosities without needing to know where they would lead. I went on photography walks with just my phone, joined a pottery class even though I wasn’t good at it, and once tried a coding workshop. I left halfway through, but I don’t regret it.
Some things became part of my life, while others didn’t. Each experiment showed me what I didn’t enjoy, which helped me find what I did. Don’t overthink or overcommit. Just explore with curiosity and notice how different things make you feel.
5. Narrow It Down Without Suffocating the Process
At one point, I had ten browser tabs open, each showing a different career path, from art therapy to UX design. I felt so overwhelmed by choices that I did nothing. That’s when I started asking myself deeper, more honest questions. What would I do even if no one noticed or praised me? What makes me forget to eat? Where do I feel like I’m truly contributing something meaningful, not just going through the motions?
Your instincts know more than you realize. Sometimes they’re quiet, and sometimes they make you feel both nervous and excited. When you feel both joy and nerves, you’re often on the right track.
6. Talk It Through With Someone Who Gets It
This step took me some time because I thought I had to figure everything out on my own. Asking for help felt like I was failing at self-discovery.
Eventually, I opened up to a coach, and it changed how I approached finding my passion. She didn’t tell me what to do, but she pointed out things I hadn’t noticed, connected dots I hadn’t seen, and challenged the stories I was holding onto without realizing it.
If you can’t talk to a coach right now, reach out to a friend who knows how to listen without trying to fix things. The right conversation at the right time can be more helpful than a whole stack of self-help books.
7. Let Passion Into Your Life Now (Not Someday)
For a long time, I thought purpose had to mean making a big, dramatic change, like quitting my job or starting a dream project overnight. But what really helped me find my passion was giving it small pockets of time in my everyday life.
I spent fifteen minutes writing in the morning before work, had creative sessions on the weekend with no agenda, and listened to inspiring podcasts during my commute. Little by little, these moments added up and changed how I felt about everything.
The more I made time for these small moments, the more they grew. Set aside fifteen minutes this week for something that excites you, with no plan or goal—just for joy. Treat it as important as any meeting, because it matters.
The Bottom Line
Here’s what I’ve learned about finding your passion: it’s not something you suddenly discover. Instead, you build and nurture it through small, consistent actions over time.
You won’t get a perfect map with clear directions, but you will find clues. The more you pay attention to your joy, your natural gifts, and your energy, the clearer things become over time.
If you feel lost right now, you’re not failing. You’re exploring, and that’s what this process is about. You’re doing well, so keep going and trust that your path will become clear.
